My friend Chris Lema says no a lot. Seriously. Google “I say no a lot” and see what happens.
See? Chris Lema.
(What you don’t find in The Google is something that Chris Lema’s close-and-personals know: he says yes even more. Hence, his insane level of busy. But don’t tell anyone- that’s a secret.)
Me? Ugh… I never say no. Even when I want to. Even when I really should.
I know it’s a lame and whiny thing to complain about, especially considering that it’s 100% self-inflicted, but dang, it’s catching up to me.
For the first year, maybe two, after I graduated from grad school I was super careful not to take anything home with me– no nights, no weekends. I got my 40 hours in, I got my work done, and I was productive and happy. But then I started saying yes to more and more extras, more and more deadlines, and I can’t… stop…
It’s like I’m addicted. But I need to kick the habit because it’s sucking away my time, and consequently, my happiness.
When I’m short on time, I don’t blog. But I really, really like blogging. And when I’m short on time, it makes household chores seem so much worse because they’re just crappy things on top of more crappy things. And worst of all, when I’m short on time, even fun things feel like nothing more than other things that I have to do.
That’s enough! Time to reclaim my time! Time to channel my inner Lema and say NO when no is what I really need to be saying.
… but not until I get back from Phoenix next week. Kind of boxed myself in with deadlines up until my plane departs. Oops.
In other news: I’m going to Phoenix next week! Yay! I went to the HMO Research Network (HMORN) conference for the first time last year and l-o-v-e-d it… loved it so much that I’m going back again! (Actually, I don’t really get to choose, but a series of generous physician-scientist benefactors have allowed me to go two years in a row now, and thank goodness for that!) I know HMOs have a really negative connotation (I’ve seen Sicko… and yes, it disturbed me), but at the HMORN conference last year I was pleasantly surprised with the number of people and number of initiatives with HMO that are truly dedicated to improving patient care. All of the organizations there have dedicated research branches– Marshfield Clinic, Kaiser Permanente, Group Health, Geisinger, Pilgrim Health, etc. It’s pretty awesome.
But more importantly (and superficially, of course): PHOENIX.
That’s a 50 degree difference… plus, complete lack of precipitation, frozen or otherwise, in Phoenix. Yes, please!
PS: Did you actually click on the hyperlink for “I say no a lot”? You should… it’s hilarious. Have you seen Let Me Google That for You? It’s geniusly sarcastic and I love it.
2 thoughts on “Too much yes. No!”
I sometimes have a hard time saying no, too…although not usually work-related. My darling Rachel, your happiness is worth much more than promising people things and holding yourself to unreal expectations. Even as amazing as you are, you can’t do everything; you can’t be everything to everyone. You need to take care of you! You need to make time for yourself, to do the things you enjoy. You know what they say about all work and no play!
You’re so wise, Marie! Write a book! Write a booook!